Me love you long time.

Expecting a emotional love blog dedicated to Steve? Ha well that's so not what this is. But quickly let me update you on the wedding plans. My dress came in! Only two people have seen it, my friend's mom who altered the bust, and Kaytee. It needed to be brought in by a couple of inches. She did it last night, so now the dress is hanging in the closet ready to be worn. I have to wear heals with this dress, as it sits on the floor with flip flops; but with the heals it just grazes the floor and looks really good plus helps with posture. I personally love the dress and was thinking of going to Columbia and getting a shawl for it, since it might be a little chilly outside. But today Kaytee came over and saw the dress on me, and totally got the best feedback from her. She loved it on me and said it was perfect and that I was glowing. It totally helped ease my nerves. I am just so paranoid about it looking good on me...especially cuz all eyes will be on me. And might I remind you that I hate being the center of attention. And the thought of all these people watching me, just makes me straight out nervous. I am so thankful for Kaytee's reassurance.

Not many people know of how deep Kaytee's and my past is. We go back a long ways, even before CCCB. We have been there for each other in almost all of life's huge moments in the past 7 years. She has known me at my worse, when I was making stupid boy decisions, and at my best. She has lived with me in college, overseas, and here in Moberly. We have had crazy moments in outhouses, orphanages, hospitals, cafes, dealerships, etc. She knows me better then a lot of people out there. She has seen me grown up. We have had our moments, especially the past yearish, and I have greatly missed her being part of my life. She was my best friend. It's like a part of me had died, when we stopped talking last August. In the past week it got to the point of being too much for me, and I decided to stop being stubborn and apologize for our problems, and as a result we have moved on and started being friends again. It's like picking up where we left off before our problems started last summer. A huge part of me regrets not having her in my wedding. She deserved that maid of honor spot. And part of me wishes she was. Not a lot of people agree with that, but it's how I feel. But what's done is done. Last night I went over to her house, and I can't begin to describe how it felt to spend time with her, with a clean air around us. It's like good friends reuniting and moving on. It's like the old days. It was much needed. I can hang out with a lot of people, but it's never the same as just her and me. No one compares. It's hard to describe it for others to understand. We have both changed a lot in the past several months, and it's a good change. We have grown up, cleaned up our acts so to say. I am proud of the way she is raising Carigan and I am even more proud to call her my friend. Me love you long time Kaytee.

Anyways back to the wedding, yesterday after work I stopped by the beauty school and made hair/makeup/nail appointments for the 21st and 22nd. The overall picture is definitely coming close as we are making last minute plans. My sister bought her plane ticket yesterday, and the thought of seeing her and Matt in a little over 2 weeks is quite exciting. I am so ready for Steve to just start staying here at the house at night instead of leaving to go to his place. It's really getting old him living in 2 different places, especially when most of his free time is spent at our house or at work. It stinks when he leaves at night to go back to Kevin and Laurens. But in 2 weeks it will all be over. Anyways I am tickled pink that I get to marry my best friend in 16 days.