Monday, September 27, 2010


Did you know the one pound of fat equals to 3500 calories? 3500 can you believe it! I was doing some research today and came across this, and it said that if you have a 500 calorie deficiency from what you eat and your exercise burning then you should lose a pound a week. 3500, that seems like so much, no wonder people don't easily lose weight.

I broke down today and bought a gym membership. I probably should have waited 2 weeks till I have some extra money, but I am tired of making excuses. It will be a bit of a sacrifice this next 2 weeks since finances were already tight, but I will make it due.

Tomorrow starts working out day # 1.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

A Brick Wall

Today I went to church for the second time since returning from vacation. It makes me sad that I would rather choose my bed then worshiping with fellow believers. I think it is because I am not connected in a church, a church that feels like home. Well today I made a decision to get out of bed and go to church. I went, and I felt like I hit a brick wall. There is so many areas of my life that needs fixed...
My relationship with God, which I am working on. It is a day to day process, but isn't that with any relationship? But today changed, because I stepped foot in church, I had a heart to heart with God, and we are getting back on track. It feels like such a relief. It's like everything in life goes wrong when there is a problem with me and God, like there is a brick wall that I built between us. Well the fact is that I tore down the wall, and am now rebuilding my relationship with my Abba.
My finances. Ugh I work 40 hours a week, and I still don't have enough money. Money to pay the bills. Rent, credit card, water, electric, 2 student loans, current school payment, tv, internet. It all adds up. I put my application in for another job, but they haven't called back. But the reality is I have enough to pay the bills, just not much after that. I want to pay off my debt, but it takes all I have just to pay the current bills due. But at least I have a full time job and can pay my current bills.
My weight. I am ashamed of it. I am pissed at every one for letting me get to my weight, for the bad food choices, and letting me skip the gym. I have a problem, and that is I am morbidly obese. I need to loose weight, I need to eat healthier. I like to people watch and I see overweight people and think "well at least I am not as big as them". It's like I am not looking in the mirror. Hello I am, I am just choosing to think otherwise. To think that I am not that bad. I think, maybe I could apply for the biggest loser, but they aren't casting right now. Well I need to do something about it, not wait. Well since it is 3 months to Christmas, I am going to start doing about it.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

90 days!

Well it's officially fall, and oh has the weather turned. It is currently 54 degrees outside, with the high of the day of being 69! I pulled out my hoodie today and love wearing it. A fellow alumni, Corey Pinkerton, is a contestant on the Biggest Loser this season, and the show just had it's season premier this past week. Of course it got me thinking again. I got way off of track with my weight loss when I started summer classes, finances got tough and life at home got a tad bit stressful. Enough about excuses. As I was watching the Biggest Loser on Tuesday it got me thinking, if a guy that I know can get on the show then why not me? Why don't I send in an application for it? Well if I did it wouldn't be until next year, so that wont help the immediate problem. Why wait? I think that will be another excuse. Then it hit me today. Christmas is in 90 days. 3 months exactly. Can you believe it? Loosing weight can be costly. The cost of a gym membership, healthy food, time. But those are just excuses. So 3 months, 90 days, and a goal of 30 pounds. even if I can't afford a gym membership right now, I can at least take Cady for walks. Due able? I think so, scratch that I know so.

Friday, September 24, 2010


At the bright and early hour at 8:15 am (yes that's early since I don't get home till almost midnight and bed last night till 2:30 am!) I received a phone call from an investigator at the prison saying I was being summed into court asap. Like 5 minutes ago asap! She said if I don't get there to testify that the case will be thrown out. I ask her what it was in regard to, many different incidents at work are rushing through my mind in the past 2 years, and she says it was about an inmate that was in a fight in September of 2009. Umm I don't remember the beginning of this September let alone last September, and all I can remember is September of 09' was when I had gotten Cady. That's all I remember. So I rush around couldn't decide what I needed to wear, so I put scrubs on, and drove to Huntsville, walked in, met the investigator, there is the inmate that I am well aware of since I give him Paxil 10 mg every day at 1600 and as soon as I get there they call me onto the stand, ask my name, and then they are like "umm judge we called the wrong nurse in!" So needless to stay, I went back home and went to bed.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

To Buy or Not to Buy

Lately I have been watching way too much HGTV. Shows such as buying houses, selling houses, income properties, design to sell, I can go on and on. I love it! I love seeing rooms refurnished and updated. It has got me thinking recently of buying a house. I went to Sutherland's yesterday and got lumber to make slates for the new bed in the guest bedroom, and literally spent an hour going up and down every aisle looking at nails, screws, paint, knobs, lights, toilets, sinks, wood, etc. I love the smell of a hardware store. So much possibilities. Let's face it I have been in Moberly 6 years now. I love my job. I am hesitant to say this, but I can see myself here for many years. I grew up in the military, we moved every 2 years, like clock-work, so for me to even want a house and settle down that is just umm different. It's like the American dream. I want a house with a garden, a lavatory, a porch swing, a yard big enough for Cady (and maybe a future playmate) to run free and enjoy barking at the birds. I want to be a little in the country, not like right down town. Oh my I think Missouri has changed this city girl. I really think renting wastes a lot of money. I pay $625 a month, for a house that I have tried to make homey, and at the end of the year what do I have to show for it? Absolutely nothing, zilch, nada. Even if I dont end up buying, I think we are going to look for a cheaper place to rent ($625 is high for Moberly) and I really need a bigger yard for my puppy. We shall see.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

umm what day is it?

Ever wake up and have no clue what day it was? Cady started having this serious bark that someone was at the house the jolted me awake, and thus jumped out of bed. It was the mail lady. The same one that comes every day at the same time...I got the mail to see that our water bill went down $30 and just yesterday got the electric bill saying it went down $100! It's crazy that much changed with just Kaytee and Carigan moving out. I am excited to see next month what it will be with Laurie gone, and the a/c off. As I was checking the mail though I noticed the neighborhood girls outside, and couldn't help but think "why aren't they in school?". I guess I forgot today is Saturday...

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

A needed day off

Ever need one of those days where you just don't do anything? Yah that's me today. But probably because every day off has been filled with moving people, grocery shopping, and what not. Today I am not planning to leave the house once. HAHA yah right, I don't know if it will work or not. But it's nice to know that I have nothing that needs to be done today.

Lately I have been thinking of getting a second job. Finances are quite tight, and I am tired of it. It seems like all the money is going towards bills with very little left over. No matter how much I said that I hate to move, I think it definitely needs to be something of consideration once February comes. I think we could downsize to a 2 bedroom house with a yard for Cady less then the $625 we are spending now for the 3 bedroom duplex. The idea of moving is so not appeasing right now, but maybe it a few months, and if we can find a good place with a good deal. Hmm who knows!

A coworker just told me that she got turned down her acceptance letter for the RN program, so that is down 2 that I know of. I am number 4 on the waiting list, so at least number 2 now. Maybe it still is a possibility. A lot can happen in 3 1/2 months... Speaking of nursing there was a patient of ours that was getting IV medication due to a very rare disease, and it causes petechiae. Anyways his vein collapsed and he needed a new IV site placed, and none of the nurses could get a successful stick, so they called me. I just laughed at them, like 'and you called me, why?' type of thing. Anyways much to everyone's shock I got a darn good stick on the first attempt! That is always a little booster to one's week.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Just Us

Well I doubt that anyone reads this, but figure I might as well update by saying that Laurie moved out yesterday. It took us from 9am to 7pm to move everything but she is finally settling into her own place. So now it's just Steve and me and of course my big puppy in our house. Steve and I are such an odd pair, we sometimes come off as an old married couple. I think we are going to make the third bedroom into an office/guest bedroom. So anyone wanna visit? I am happy with how the house is coming together. It's mostly all the way done, just some odd's and end's we are keeping out eye open for. Today I am conquering the kitchen and reorganizing it. I love how life seems less drama free and stressful.