One Week

Exactely one week from right now I will be getting off my last shift at the Prince William County Manassas Regional Adult Detention Center. Exactely one week from now we will be hitting the road, driving across country, and starting our new but really old life again. I am so ready to get in the car and just go, to follow the big wide open blue sky...though the packing that hasn't begun would tell you otherwise. I am so ready to not work overnights again, yet I do enjoy my coworkers, but really no one compares to my Moberly coworkers who became like family to me over the years. I am so ready to have my own place again. I am so ready to have good close friends again. I am so ready to be in a small community where everyone knows everyone and all their business.

I may be ready, but I am starting to majorly stress out. Stressed out with living arrangements, my dog staying with Andrea, us with some dear friends, finding a place to call our own. Stressed out with finances was a huge part. However tonight I got an email from work saying I am getting an extra $855.11 on Friday because of Virginia taking out too my money for the VRS. Not sure why, but heck I will take the money, and in what better timing. PTL! So now the financial stress is dying back a bit. Then the stress of packing, and not just packing for a trip, but going through my stuff yet again and deciding what we need. I almost feel it would be best to set fire to all the stuff so I wouldn't have the stress of going through it. Of course we need clothes, but also what about pot and pan, dishes, tv, laptop, the dog, etc. Stuff we will need when we are there.

Then there is all this drama with my family. I don't understand why they can't be supportive of me and Steve. Sure they don't know Steve as well as I do, I don't really expect that anyone on this face of the earth does, but not a single person in my family has even really tried to get to know him. It kills me, because I am suppose to say how open and welcoming my family is. And really, they haven't been. I just want to tell them all that they better get use to hearing his name, because he will be a major part of the rest of my life whether they like it or not.

All I can say is that we are moving back to Moberly. And we are getting married. And I am to the point that eloping sounds better and better every day. Will I do it? Probably not. It's not about a legal piece of paper to me, but more a committment between Steve, me and God. I honestly can not see myself living without him. Quite simply put, I love him. I think it will be for the best of our future to move, be away from the stress of added pressure and be in a community that supports us. A community that we can raise a family in.