What If...

...there seems to be several "what if's" being thrown around in the air right now. With mainly one big one looming overhead that very well may become reality or it may seem like a far off dream. I don't want to go into what the "what if's" might be at this point, but maybe on Monday I will. Excuse me for a moment, but this post is going to be alot of rambling as I try to clear my thoughts and get a sense of what is going on. Anyways back to the "what if's"...today I woke up after just a mere 6 hour sleep and knew we had to have a very indepth convo. So that's what we did. A convo that started off in one direction and several hours later ended in a completely different one. Usually in our indepth heart-to-heart convos I end up with peace knowing that we have grown stronger together just having those difficult talks. But today was different. Today left me with some hope and dreaming of the possibilities. There are pro's and con's to both "what if's", but it seems like in the end our heart is telling us one big thing while our mind might be telling us something else. I don't want to act out of emotions, but logically and rationally make a decision that is best for our future. The more and more that I dwell on it, the more that I want this "what if" of the heart to become a reality. It's soo easy to be attainable, like a light at the end of a tunnel. I can see the bittersweet end to that tunnel and I want to hop into the light and into the future of foreverness. As Steve said, life is too short, so maybe we should pursue our dreams and passions. I wish it was easy to know if it is God's Will or not. I wish it could be as easy as getting a smack across the head, a writting on the wall, a burning bush...but sadly life's not as easy as that. It may not be that easy, but I know that if we chose this "what if" of the heart that we will be okay and we will enjoy the life that we chose. A decision that will change the rest of our life together. I want us to be content and happy, is that too much to ask for? All I know is that I am going to pray without ceasing until we have the peace that passes all understanding.